Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Broken Spirit

We had our best day ever at the Little Italy Mertcato on Christmas Eve.  We've been doing this market for over three years, every Saturday.  The day was beautiful, the people energetic and overall, cheerful.

My day was filled with joy as I met new and repeat customers wanting to buy "LilyGirl" for Christmas gifts.  I can't count how many times I came around to the front of the table to offer a hug and greeting to those familiar faces.  I heard countless times about how their favorite earrings were one's I had made.  My sister Denise, and friend Leah were there with me, selling, helping restock, and showing off our latest collections.  The market closed at 1:30 officially, but we had a line and sold till after 2:00. 

Celebrating our accomplishments with our neighbors and market friends, we busily packed up and headed home to start our own Christmas Eve in our homes with family.  Only one stop, the grocery store, to pick up one last gift.  In and out I was, and then home to a beautiful house, filled with sparkle and the buzz of the neighborhood kids running the streets with anticipation.  Ahhhhhh, feels so good.

To dinner next door, to bed early, and up celebrating Christmas Day.  Parents came over and we had a lovely brunch, opened presents and as usual, a perfect day in Cardiff.  As everyone was leaving, I decided I should pay my mom the money she made Christmas Eve at the Mercato.  We sold many of her hand-crocheted headbands.  To the office, where I keep my admin box, not there.  Hmmm, to the car, I didn't take it out yet?  Not there.  Panic.  Where is it?  Back to the house, searching frantically, then back to the car, nope.  Gone.

How could this happen?  Retrace my footsteps...Vons.  Did I not lock the car?  Of course I did.  But maybe not?  Could it have been taken out of my car in my own driveway on my charming and private little street?  No way.  I can't believe it, I can't believe it, I just kept repeating.  In denial for many hours, I kept looking back in the car.  By now I couldn't stop my tears, my stomach ache, my heart ache.  And now, it's Christmas Day, in the afternoon hour, the time when our house is glowing with sunshine and we should be relaxing and enjoying the rest of this holiday.

It's gone.  All that cash, our credit card machine, my camera, video camera, tools and all my admin supplies.  It's gone.  And for many days now, my spirit has been gone too.  Or maybe it's just broken, and it can be mended.  Yes, it's only money, no one got hurt, all these things can be replaced.  Thank goodness.  But my spirit has been deflated and need to get it back! 

I am writing this as a way to move on.  A way to get it off my chest.  I'm not sure about forgiving the person who did this.  I can't go there yet.  But I hope I can stop the pains that I still have when I think about someone stealing from us.  I hope I can fill my heart with all the love and remember the beautiful energy that surrounded that day.  I thank the people who gave me that spirit and thank them for loving what we do. 


  1. balling my brains out right now...
    yes, darling, it was a beautiful day.
    i, too, am still processing that the box was stolen.
    your spirit will mend...let's get start mending it today! xo

  2. Your pain and hurt was palpable...
    With time the beauty and spirit of that day will outshine the devastation of today...

  3. Marisa Esquer Horner28 December, 2011

    I'm so very sorry this happened to you. I feel for you and just know
    that no one or anything can take your spirit. The joy you have for what
    you do, your creations is in your heart and belongs to you alone. No one can ever take that from you. Much love to you. mj

  4. Karma...what goes around, comes around. There is a reason for everything that happens in our lives. Hopefully you will discover why this happened to you and grow from this experience.


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